Vulva Original is an actual scented product with a vaginal odor that is specifically described as “not being a perfume.” The scent is intended to “stimulate the one who wears it rather than someone else.” While most perfume products act as “odor cues” and are used to improve ones personal odor in order to become more attractive or social acceptable, Vulva Original is designed to be consumed by its owner by applying a drop of it to skin for sniffing it immediately after.
2Funeral Home Scent
Demeter’s Fragrance Library carries a plethora of bizarre and oddball scents in the form of Colognes, Shower Gel, and Body Lotions that “harken back to childhood memories.” One of their strangest scents is the “Funeral Home,” a blend of classic white flowers: lilies, carnations, gladiolus, chrysanthemums with stems and leaves, with a hint of mahogany and oriental carpet, smelling just like the last funeral you attended.
3Paint Perfume in a Spray
I’ve always wanted to spray myself with a spray paint can… and now I can do just that with a perfume. Wode is the first ever visible fragrance by Boudicca, it comes in a graffiti spray can and its color is cobalt blue. At first it will turn your skin and clothing blue, but it will disappear after some time. This version is called Wode Paint, there is also a normal one, Wode Scent, for those who don’t trust it.
4Burger King Body Spray
In 2008, fast-food chain Burger King launched a meat-scented cologne in the US for under US$4, aptly called “Flame.” Not recommended for vegetarians, Flame is being promoted as “the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broilled meat.” You can purchase it through their website.
5Stilton Cheese Perfume
In 2006, the makers of Stilton cheese have launched their own perfume, Eau de Stilton, which claims to “recreate the earthy and fruity aroma” of the pungent blue cheese “in an eminently wearable perfume.” The perfume, blended by a Manchester-based aromatics company, features a “symphony of natural base notes including yarrow, angelica seed, clary sage and valerian.”
Another crazy scent from Demeter’s Fragrance Library is the Lobster Scent. Probably their most obtuse fragrance, it is “dead on,” so to speak; a combination of the sea, sweet meat, and a hint of drawn butter.
7Secretions Magnifique — Blood, Semen, and Spit
Ever had that “not so fresh” feeling? Then I highly recommend that you don’t spray on Secretions Magnifique from Etat Libre d’Orange perfumers. Available in the US only at the swank Henri Bendel department store in NYC, it smells of. . . how do I put this delicately? Sweat, spunk, and blood. Oh, the French! From their smelly cheeses to their famed aversion to daily baths. They have seriously cornered the market on stinky.
8Own DNA Fragrance
What do you smell like? My DNA Fragrance is a unique fragrance company that creates biologically seductive liquid treasures that caress the secret desires of the mind from DNA blueprints. No two people will smell alike again, so the fragrance is as unique as well. The company has recently started using celebrities’ DNA code for a new line of celeb perfumes, including that of Marilyn Monroe and Barack Obama.
According to their makers, the Cannabis Santal Eau de Parfum “features a woodsy fragrance that captures the raw energy of desire and is housed in a mini artisanal bottle. Exotic citruses and warm notes of chocolate, vetiver, and vanilla musk surround the unique heart of this seductive scent: a special proprietary accord that captures the raw sensuality of cannabis, known for its woodsy, musky properties.”
10KISS Cologne Spray
We do wanna rock and roll all night, but not smell like it. The idea of associating cologne with four sweaty guys with goth makeup doesn’t sound sweet, but hey, there’s something out there for everyone.